It is okay to ask for help

We all need help at times in our lives.  It’s okay to ask for help.

I need you and you need me.  We are all blessed with unique gifts, talents and abilities. It is that way for a reason so that we will reach out and help each other.  This giving and receiving create great relationships.

It takes great courage to ask for help.

For one reason or another, many of us do not like to ask for help.  Requesting support can often make us feel very vulnerable. We may have been taught that it is a sign of weakness to ask for help or we may think that we are self-sufficient.

Sometimes, we stand in the way of receiving the help that we need.  Certain beliefs or ways of thinking that we carry makes it hard for us to ask for help.

Perhaps, we are afraid to hear no. 

Back in the day, a lot of fear would descend upon me when I required help.  The biggest fear – What if this individual say “no” to my request?

Who wants to hear “no” when they are in a spot and needs help? 

Of course, some people have said no to my requests.  That’s okay too.  I had to learn to get pass those “crazy” feelings and emotions.  Indeed, that too shall pass.

Keep focus.

I am just a positive person because I believe that no one would genuinely refuse to help, if it is in his/her power to do so.  After all, we have all been helped at one time or another in our lives.  Still, be of the mindset that whenever you make a request, it is okay for that individual to say no … even without giving an explanation.  It is a request and a request can be accepted or declined.  Don’t take it personally, this person may have a lot going on and cannot help at this time.

There is hope.

I have learned that there are people who genuinely want to help you.  No strings attached.  They simply want to help you get ahead.

So, position yourself to ask for help… not just any help, specific help, good help, to take you to your next level of unprecedented opportunities and success.

Here is how to ask for help.

1.  Decide what you need help with

2.  Select a person to approach – someone you believe has the knowledge or ability to help you with this task

3.  Contact this person – make an appointment where necessary

4.  Be prepared to share what you need help with.  Record your thoughts about the matter for clarity and brevity.

5.  Be clear on the results that you desire to achieve

6.  Listen and ask relevant questions

7.  Thank this person for their support

8.  Assess the advice and determine whether or not you need to proceed with it or you need a second opinion.

Final thoughts

If you ask and you receive “no” for the answer, try again with another person.

I have discovered a beautiful thing about asking for help, it is truly liberating.  So, congratulate yourself on having the courage to ask for help.  Let us not only ask for help but be willing helpers.

I would love to hear your thoughts.

Ann Marie Bryan

CEO & Founder of Victorious By Design

Author of Unforgettable, My Love Has Come Along


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  • Shantelle Mucha
    October 27, 2012

    I discovered your blog using google. I must I am floored by your blog. Keep up the good work.

  • October 5, 2012

    I wonder if sometimes the people who like to help the most are the ones who are the most fearful to ask for help.

    I really liked the 8 steps, and I’m already thinking of ways that I can implement them.

    Since I’m one of those who have a hard time asking for help, this is going to require some intentionality, but I’m glad I came across your post because I definitely need help in a few areas.


    • Ann Marie Bryan
      October 5, 2012

      Hi Jeremy, thanks for stopping by and leaving your comments.

      It really takes courage to ask for help because for some strange reason we feel vulnerable when we do. Also, if an individual has always played the role of helper, then he/she will find it difficult to ask for help.

      Back in the day, it was hard for me to ask for help but now I do. Things get done quicker and easier if I go to someone with the natural gifting for the area that I desire help with. We are all blessed with unique gifts, talents and abilities. It is that way for a reason so that we will reach out and help each other.

      Yes, #8 is important. We have to assess the advice. A second opinion never hurts. Above all, let us take everything to God in prayer and allow Him to direct our paths.

      All the best in your endeavors! Stay victorious! Visit us again soon!

  • Clair Servi
    September 6, 2012

    I just want to mention I’m all new to blogging and absolutely liked this website. Very likely I’m want to bookmark your website . You really come with very good stories. Thank you for sharing with us your blog.

    • Ann Marie Bryan
      September 6, 2012

      Thanks Clair! Have a victorious day!

  • Paula
    August 16, 2012

    I am taking this advise to heart. I am terrified to ask for help because I do not trust easily and recoils when I feel shunned. The Lord has been doing an awesome work in me and I am finally and slowly coming out of my shell!

    • Ann Marie Bryan
      August 16, 2012

      Awww! What a blessing! I thank God for you. No one likes rejection. But, we learn not to take it personally. The Holy Spirit is a great teacher, continue to rely on Him. Have a blessed day!

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